The Difference Between Me and June Cleaver–or, Why I don’t Wear Pearls When I Vacuum

In an effort to get the kids to watch more ‘wholesome’ television, we borrowed Leave it to Beaver from the library.  Now that I’m a mom, in the year 2013, I really got a kick out of the differences in parenting today and back in Beaver’s time…here’s a few of the differences I noticed between me and the Beav’s mom:

June gets a call from another parent asking if she can host the teacher luncheon at her house next Thursday.

June:  Why sure!  I’d love too!  It would be an honor.

Me:  Holy cow, are you kidding me?!  How can I get out of this…what can we be doing next Thursday and every day leading up to it??  Am I saying all of this out loud?!

Ward has great news for the boys.

Ward:  I get to work on the committee to help develop the Youth Center in town boys!

Me:  Geezil Pete I got suckered into another committee.  How in the heck am I going to find someone to watch the kids so I can go to more meetings?  Or maybe I can bring them and everyone will hate me…then I can cross it off my list….

The principal (surprisingly, a lady!) calls the Cleavers at home and talks to June.  She tells her Mr. Cleaver must come to the school as soon as possible to talk to her about the Beav’s inappropriate behavior.  He has made a funny face in the class picture, but she will not tell June this detail.

June:  Oh my.  Well, could you tell me what happened?  Oh, I see.  You need Ward.  Well, I’ll tell him to call you.  Thanks!

Me:  Whaaaat?  You want to talk to my husband?  Fantastic.  Could you also ask him to start checking the kids’ homework?  Thanks.  I’ll get back to my stories now.

Ward gives June parenting advice after she blames herself for the Beav losing the Community Chest money he has collected.

Ward:  Oh June.  Don’t become one of those modern parents and blame yourself for something the kids did. (I can’t make up this stuff.  That was really what he said).

Me:  Blame myself?  Please. 

It is pretty entertaining to watch Leave It to Beaver so many years later.  I always thought Eddie Haskell was pretty slick, but he’s really a jerk!  Framing the poor Beav by changing that D- on his report card to a B+. 

Clearly, I have no life. 

Before my husband expects me to start wearing pearls and vacuuming more, I think we’ll switch back to Gilligan’s Island.  I can handle making a few coconut cream pies…especially since Kroger has them in their freezer section. 

And, I don’t have much more tolerance for words like “swell” and “gee”. 

Stay tuned as I search for more golden oldies to force my kids to watch in the van…where they are restrained quiet.

What shows from your childhood have you shared with your kids?

Just Sit Right Back and You’ll Hear a Tale…

Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale,
A tale of a fateful trip
That started from this tropic port
Aboard this tiny ship

Cue thunder and lightening…because I am not sure how to spell that particular sound effect.  Although, I can hear it perfectly in my head right now. 

Why am I singing the theme song from Gilligan’s Island?  And, you are also probably thanking me for getting it stuck in your head.  You are welcome.

I LOVED Gilligan’s Island when I was a kid.  I could not decide if I wanted to be Mary Ann or Ginger, because both ladies are so fabulous.  I had a huge crush on the Professor.  My husband laughs at this, but when I point out the other possible love interests on the island he understands.  Looking back, I do wonder how the Professor kept those white shoes and shirt so clean and those neatly pressed pants so crisp.  Now that I’m approaching forty, I may have to change my crush to Mr. Howell…he could buy me things.  I don’t need a coconut phone, Professor.

Back to why I am on a Gilligan’s Island kick. 

I get so tired of the kids watching Pokémon, Adventure Time (really we don’t watch that much because I hate it), Gumball, or Jessie.  These shows are so fast paced and too mature.  Maybe I’m a prude.  So, while I was perusing the videos at the library, I ran across Gilligan’s Island.

Wooohoooo!!!  Jackpot!

Seriously, I loved that show.  I can still remember sitting on the floor in my mom’s living room eating vanilla wafers watching the episode in which they thought the island was haunted.  I know.  I’m exciting. 

Luckily, the kids love it too.  We’ve been through all of the DVDs the library owns.  They know the song by heart…who doesn’t?!  And they all have their favorite character.  They all love Ginger.  For different reasons. 

I love hearing Middle Child ‘talk’ to Gilligan on the screen…

“No, Gilligan!!  Don’t eat it!!!”

Of course, Gilligan eats it.  Oh Gilligan.

Listening to the show from the front seat of the van makes me wonder…how in the heck did so many guest stars get on and off the island, but through a comedy of errors those poor castaways were stuck?  I heard Zsa Zsa Gabor from the driver’s seat the other day!  She made it off the island!

I know I am over thinking it. 

I had the great idea that all five of us could be the castaways for Halloween this year.  Of course, how many other kids are going to understand that?  The Husband loved the idea, but I could not convince The Third Grader to be the Skipper.  Nor would Middle Child be his little buddy.  Party poopers.  Baby Girl was all about being The Movie Star though….of course.

We’ve moved on to “Leave It to Beaver”.  It’s not the hit that Gilligan was.  They say it’s too boring.  I need to find more Gilligan DVDs.  Middle Child is particularly interested in finding the episode in which they get off the island.  He wants to see them get to Hawaii and make sure the Skipper gets his nice, juicy steak. 

Do your kids watch any of your favorite childhood tv shows?  Are they as awesome as you remember?  For me, Gilligan’s Island kept its charm.  But, when I showed them The Dark Crystal, I was shocked at how cheesy it really was.  I’m sure they’ll look back on some of their favorite shows with the same feeling.

Stay tuned to hear my review of Leave It to Beaver…